7.3 Better Self: Your Current Struggles and Conflicts Are Precisely to Compute the Next You Who Won’t Need to Struggle. We Are Stepping Stones for Our Future Selves.

In the previous section, we defined pain as “bug reports” and regret as “backpropagation.” This gives negative experiences functional meaning. However, there is a deeper existential anxiety troubling us: Why can’t I become better right now? Why do I still struggle in old patterns even though I know what’s right? Why is change so slow, often even accompanied by regression?

This section will answer this question from the perspectives of Optimization Theory and Computational Complexity. We will prove: Current struggles are not meaningless consumption, but necessary “pre-computation” to find the global optimum in complex free energy landscapes.

The current you (Self_v1.0) is the Bootloader for the future you (Self_v2.0). You are spending your entire life laying the algorithmic foundation for that more perfect version.

7.3.1 Struggle as Computation: Physical Consumption of Gradient Descent

Why do we feel “conflicted”?

In QCA physics, conflict corresponds to consciousness encountering a Saddle Point or Plateau in the free energy landscape.

• You face two choices A and B.

• Your internal model tells you that choosing A reduces error in one dimension but increases it in another; choosing B is the opposite.

• The gradient $\nabla F$ becomes unclear or cancels out here.

At this point, the system falls into high-frequency oscillation. To break the deadlock, your brain must perform extensive Counterfactual Simulation: simulating “what if I choose A,” “what if I choose B.”

This simulation is extremely computationally expensive ($v_{int}$), subjectively experienced as anxiety and internal consumption.

But don’t underestimate this internal consumption.

This is proof that computation is happening.

If a problem can be solved instantly (without struggle), it’s a simple problem with low logical depth. Every problem that requires you to struggle day and night is an NP-hard problem the universe throws at you.

Your current struggle is actually searching the solution space for this problem. Every wrong option you eliminate prunes the decision tree for the future.

7.3.2 Simulated Annealing: To Escape Local Minima

Why do we sometimes need to experience intense pain (such as heartbreak, bankruptcy, serious illness) to grow?

Why does stable life often lead to stagnation?

This corresponds to Simulated Annealing in optimization algorithms.

• Local minimum trap: If you only pursue current comfort (greedy algorithm), you easily fall into a local valley (e.g., a job you don’t like but is stable, a mediocre relationship). Although $F$ here isn’t lowest, there are high walls all around, requiring large changes.

• Heating: To escape this trap and find a deeper valley (global optimum), the system must introduce noise, increase “temperature.”

• Physical correspondence: Major life blows are this kind of “heating.” They forcibly raise the system’s free energy, shaking you out of your comfort zone.

In that high-temperature, chaotic, painful phase, your old structure (old beliefs, old habits) is melted. Although painful, this gives you the fluidity to reshape topological structure.

Only after this high-temperature smelting can the cooled Self_v2.0 crystallize into a more perfect form.

Your current pain is the spark of reforging the sword blade in the furnace.

7.3.3 The Dignity of Stepping Stones: Success Need Not Be Mine

We must accept a humble fact: v1.0 may be destined to be imperfect.

Limited by initial conditions (genes, family of origin, era constraints), this life’s hardware and underlying code may limit your ceiling. You may spend your entire life unable to completely heal childhood trauma or fully overcome character weaknesses.

But this doesn’t mean your life is a failure.

In iterative algorithms, early iteration steps ($n=1,2,\dots$) are far from the final solution ($n\to \infty$), but they are essential.

Without the rough result of step 1, step 2 cannot perform fine corrections.

Definition 7.3 (Unitarity of Intergenerational Transfer):

When we die and reboot, although specific memories are erased, the optimization gradient of topological structure is preserved (as karma/initial values).

• Although you didn’t completely conquer fear in this life, your experience fighting fear slightly modified your soul’s curvature.

• The next life’s you, facing the same fear, will start from a slightly higher baseline.

You are stepping stones for your future self.

You are accumulating computational power for that ultimately arriving Self_vMax who will no longer struggle, no longer fear, full of love and wisdom.

7.3.4 Conclusion: Give Your Current Self a Hug

So, don’t be harsh on your current self.

When you’re frustrated by mistakes, when you blame yourself for weakness, remember: You are executing a difficult computational task.

You are the pioneer opening the path in the mud. You are the explorer trying and erring in the darkness.

That perfect future you will look back, traverse time’s wormhole, and thank this scarred current you.

Because without your current every fall and rise, the future you cannot stand on the mountaintop.

Since you’re a stepping stone, make it hard.

Since you’re a draft, write it wildly.

For that better version, please cherish every heartbeat now.

(Section 7.3 Complete)